The Proverbs 31:25 Woman – Interview #3

Click here to read the background of this series.

Interviewee: Victoria Moreno

My dear friend Vicky is one of the strongest and most vivacious woman I know.  She embraces every aspect of life with passion and makes you feel like no problem is too big to overcome. She is from Spain, but has traveled & lived in numerous countries to date. Through her persistent love and friendship, she taught me how to open up and allow people into my heart and pain. She is a beauty and a treasure, and I pray that you would be blessed not just by her sharing but also by the unique anointing that is upon her.

1. What are some of your favorite things? (:

Café latte with no sugar but a very sweet dessert! A cozy place with a book, notebook or friends to make it perfect. I also love to open my house for people to hang out!

2. How/when did your heart get captivated by God?

I have followed Jesus since I was a child, and every season in my life draws me towards different attributes or titles (Father, Protector, Rock, Healer, Friend) of God.

4 years ago, I was in Sweden reading the book “Captivated” by John & Stasi Eldredge and it really challenged my perspective on Jesus. I asked God to romance me, and He did! I started to discover Jesus as a lover. That is the time I would say that He captivated me.

It was a beautiful season. One of those where you do not find yourself praying for a husband every other week, where you look in the mirror and truly feel beautiful. In that season, I enjoyed God’s creation and allowed God to just speak to me in the quiet and solitude. God would pour out His love, and with it, gave me all the security that my heart needed. I felt loved, so I could love back. The verse “we love Him because He loves us first” became totally real.

In my current season with God, I am not experiencing the Lover as much as before. I once asked Him why was He no longer romancing me. He said, He never changes. So when I am in need of the lover, I don’t need to seek elsewhere but call unto God.

When this happens, I remember my friend Toni who once told me that she could detect that her relationship with God was at a high point when she found herself reading Songs of Solomon. At that time, I must have given her my “ARE YOU SERIOUS?!” face as my only understanding of Songs of Solomon was in the context of husband-wife relationship. Today, I can say that God has deeply moved my heart through it.

To be told by God “You are altogether beautiful my darling, and there is no blemish in you”(S.S.4:7) will change you. That is how God feeds our spirits. He speaks words of life; words that will touch and remove those longings inside of us that we so desperate seek to fill with human comforts.

3. Let’s talk a little about fears and insecurities – are there any that you can share about, and how did you overcome them.

One of the insecurities I had was regarding my beauty.  My mom has always been very encouraging in this area. But I guess, and many of you would agree with me, it is never the same to hear your mom telling you “you are beautiful” than if your dad does so.

When I was little, I was my dad’s princess. Then my parents divorced and our relationship changed. I was no longer the princess but a bitter teen towards my father.

So I became a girl who thought it was enough with a mom that believed I was pretty. I had my “strong girl attitude” who would remind myself “I am pretty” even though thoughts of  “But no guy looks at you” or “You don’t have a boyfriend” would often emerge.

How did I overcome this without getting involved in seeking boys’ attention, having multiple boyfriends, or getting into other problems like anorexia or bulimia? I honestly do not know. I just know that most of the boys whom I liked were not interested in me (which now I am glad about!), and that since I was very young I shared with God everything about my “heartaches”.

But the major breakthrough came when I really started to hear from God. As I explained before, when God is the one that speaks directly to your heart, everything changes. I started to understand that I am His princess. I started to understand that He does not have bad ideas. I started to hear that He loves me and hear Him tell me that I am beautiful.

So now I have a mom that says I am beautiful, a step-dad who also says so, I remind myself that I’m God’s princess when I don’t feel like it, and I also get to hear God almighty telling me “You look beautiful”.

Maybe one day I get my husband to tell me I am. But I strongly believe that even if he forgets, my parents pass away, and my self-esteem is to damaged to see myself the way God created me; I just have to call up to God, He answers. He is the only one that can tell me “You are beautiful” in a way that will satisfy and calm my heart.

Let me just end this question explaining an incident in the midst of this “learning that I am beautiful” process.

I was invited to a party that I didn’t feel like going to. I put on the prettiest clothes I had. I put on some make-up (note, I hardly ever use make-up). I knew I had lost some weight since the last time I saw these friends, so “rationally” I should be feeling prettier. Yet I was having one of those days where it doesn’t matter what you wear, you just feel ugly. So I prayed, “Lord, I am feeling ugly today. I don’t want to go and I hate going to parties when I am feeling spiritually weak. Please help me and protect me.” And off I went!

God answered me. I had this conversation with a drunk friend, whom I will call Dfriend.

Dfriend: Victoria! Do you want to marry me?

Vicky: Nope

Dfriend: You know, you are the coolest girl to get marry to. Any guy would love to marry you.

I can tell you he was not attracted to me. He is a handsome friend with whom I never had any relationship beyond friendship. We are not even very close friends. Soon after he started talking about marriage, I knew it. It was God’s answer…. Maybe you are saying: “C’mon! He is just a drunk guy. They all do that”. It hasn’t happened to me before or since; what a God-incidence that it happened the day I prayed…

Well my friend, pray God will open the eyes of your understanding to know when He is speaking into your life. Be it thoughts, people, images…or a donkey! YES! If He was able to use a donkey to speak His will, will He not use a drunk friend? :):)

4. Can you share your personal views on womanhood – our design, destiny, and divine place in the kingdom.

One thing I know for sure, we are as valuable as men are. Jesus paid the same price for men and women, He made a way for both of them.

Beyond that I would encourage each woman (actually everyone) to really seek God in this matter. I would say that far more important that finding out how different women are from men, is to allow God to speak into your spirit. Ask Him, He who designed you before the creation of the earth.

Many girls tend to play the “compare game”. What are some practical ways that you keep your heart at peace and contented?

Remembering that I am made different. I am not made to be someone else, though to my eyes I might see someone else who is incredibly gifted, talented and beautiful. I remember Who made me, how much He loves me, and how He wants me to be “me”. Not someone else despite how “better” they seem to do things.

That remembering goes together with prayer, making sure there’s no space left for envy.

And praise God for friends! Who, every now and then, and with love, tell you the good and the not-so-good of you! Both needed for growing 🙂